After an afternoon at the lake, I’ve taken off my handmade wig and peeled off my lashes. I’m in the perfect frame of mind to relax into a new episode of Insecure. It’s become a ritual now, and this time, while watching with bae, (and forbidden to provide commentary during the show) I knew I was going to love this episode from the first DM slide.
I love DM slides, and I love how the show uses them to push the story forward because ain’t that what happens in real life?
I could hear the black community collectively sighing when Issa was considering sending Nathan that first text. And why? He hasn’t done Issa as “dirty” as hardly any of the other major relationships she’s had. Yes, ghosting is bad. But betrayal and lying are worse. I think it’s safe to text Nathan. I like Nathan for Issa because he helps Issa get out of her head.
I was confused though. Maybe I missed something but…Nate was in LA the whole time? And even though he’s generally still on my good side, I wouldn’t necessarily trust him with my personal friendships. She ain’t had to tell him all that shit that went down with Molly. That wasn’t his business.
The Block Party was so blackety black, I felt that in my soul
Keli is slowly becoming my favorite of the 4 friends. She’s funny, she’s randy, and she’s not afraid to be proud of lying. I think more people should shamelessly reinvent themselves like she does with every new guy.
I love how the block party incorporates the diversity of Issa’s impeccable and up to the minute music taste. Throughout the show, her musical influence appears to have been consistent. It just feels like her stamp is on everything.
But the fight though. I truly undressed the point that Molly was trying to make, but she kept pushing her.
Molly and Issa could benefit from couple’s therapy
“I love her but I just don’t really like her right now.” – Molly
You know, I was listening to Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, Ph.D., a psychologists talk about friendship on her podcast. (It’s only 9 minutes, you should listen below). She talks about 3 major insights that people don’t really think about when it comes to major friendships in their life.
- As we get older, friendships take more effort to maintain.
- It’s normal for things to shift. As we change, so do our relationships.
- When we sense things changing, instead of shifting with it, we often feel that it’s impossible to salvage and we must discard it, but maybe not. Maybe it’s possible to keep our friendships, even when they change.
Or maybe Issa just needs a whole slew of friends. I really didn’t like the way Condola made it seem like Issa had something to do with her and Lawrence breaking up, and gave her that judgemental, light-skinned stare. Issa had nothing to do with it! But we still don’t know the results of that late-night slide DM slide that Law gave Issa. I wonder if the show will circle back around to it.
Of the different attachment styles (look them up, it’ll blow your mind), Issa appears to be an avoider. She has probably benefited from having a friend like Molly who pushes her to actually talk about things that she would probably more than likely avoid forever (like me). But, the toxic and destructive way that Molly approaches problems has just run its course with Issa.
Issa continually “dismissed” Molly’s relationship by making one-off comments about how it wouldn’t last. But Molly has done that to Issa with many areas of her life: her job, her block party, even her relationships. Molly feels ignored, excluded, and betrayed. Issa feels stressed, pressured, and blamed for doing nothing wrong. It’s the perfect storm.
You’re going to be most offended by what you’re the most sensitive about. But how do you approach someone about something that’s bothering you without bringing negative energy into their life?
An even better question, how do you allow someone to grow? Here’s more insight on that from a therapist.
How have you dealt with your friendships changing?
Listen to the podcast below: